ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
