just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
