DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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