Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I think I am morally bankrupt
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Randomize
