This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize
