I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
