talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
