Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
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