When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
