i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
