we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
just tell him i said nine months
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Randomize
