she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Who died my cat blue again?
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
