i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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