I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
