i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize