I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
