Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
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