I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize