So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
