I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
