Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
