I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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