hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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