Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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