sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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