Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize
