Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
where am i from again
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
