how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
The beers last night were like the tears from god
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
