i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
The struggles of a small town man whore
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
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