Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I'm gonna have a badass scar
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
