Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
