I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Enjoy the penises
Randomize
