He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
