How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
