i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
