If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
