The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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