Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize