I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
