This girl is more easily done than said...
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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