Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
