So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
