Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
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