What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
