dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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