Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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