i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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