Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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