shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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