I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
